the Yerba Mate Tea Gourd

The Yerba Mate Tea Gourd and W.E.L.O.V.E.Y.O.U. (the World Exploratory Laboratory for Obvious Value in Yerba Opportunities Unlimited), residing in a straw bale compound in the Western woodlands of the U.S., have just completed deciding that a study conducted for the past several years is worth continuing to fund... for the value inherent in the actual experimentation in the study they were conducting.

In fact a major portion of the study, which involves drinking yerba with a loved one, has been expanded to include others that we love only just a little bit--as it has been found, upon further study, that 'we' like them more and more upon further study. The study found that 'we' also like them more and more when they learn how to pour a good 'mate' for 'us'--especially after the long training: a natural byproduct of the study.

Yerbatero Karl Heiss, of the Yerba Mate Tea Gourd, was quoted as saying, "It just doesn't make sense to give it up now--after we've done all of this stuff. I really think we can change the direction of the world. I'm even willing to expand things to include cats I wouldn't normally drink with... like religious people and republicans.

"In this day and age we can use all of the extra love going around that we can get. Right? Tea, not bombs, man... dig?

"It's like... we're all 'one' sittin' around passing the gourd and that's like as complicated as it needs to get...."

Upon further questioning the new insights he brought forth seemed to dry up like the last sips of a washed-out mate... however the basic gyst of the study results seemed to be a mandate for further study. This, of course, was after drinking several 'mates' with him--wherein we became so wired that we were practically unable to write, but spent the latter part of the evening "cutting a rug", as he said, dancing to acid jazz, old bebop, and hip-hop tunes. Our original notes, lost during this period, and much of the conversation, had to be reproduced from memory. [It is worth mentioning that we had quite a few more good memories, upon reflection, than we thought we had previously. There was both a quantifiable increase in memories, and increase in good memories--both observations which parallel actual findings from the study.]

Reading the study itself doesn't help much to comprehend, in a literal sense, what it has all been about. The actual wording, from their own scientific literature, states, "All further study shall be poured into the most worthy vessel possible (study should be made into what are the most worthy) and this should be investigated as slowly and joyfully as necessary, or as participants dictate at the moment, until such time as those involved in the study are moved to further investigation--whereupon another vessel shall be provided, other participants involved (by a natural selection process--to be determined by further study) and focus be put on how much focus in being put on the process of the studying and how this focus increases with further study, how joyful is the focus, and how the qualitative aspects of studying generate more or less desire and focus, and an enhanced focus on desire."

Upon the question of 'desire' several participants in the study (who declined to be named in this interview) twittered with maidenlike silliness on their couches, covered their mouths, or sipped their mates too fast and nearly choked with laughter. Those who did respond, with promise of anonymity, stated that the study of the desire (that manifested itself through the original study) was now, for them, the major focus... and they were requesting further bags of foundation research material in order to elope and get married--which they said could only enhance the true nature of their work in this study and the world at large.

As if in answer to the questions on my face I was directed by study subjects to several 6 through ten-year-olds who, it was said, were offspring of original study members. These, it must be said, seemed to be well-adjusted, gifted, and happy children who spent much time in study and the painting of pictures and playing of music--which greatly enhanced my quality of stay with the entire group. The greatest understanding of this came to me when I eventually forced myself to leave the premises and found I missed their nearly continual chatter and creativity; their padding and sliding of stocking feet over the hand-hewn hardwood floors, and positive outlook on life. I had asked a small group of four of them, who were carrying a thermos to their parents, what they though of all of 'this' (gesturing around at their parents). They looked at me quite seriously and replied, "There's a lot of love here."

Labels: drinking, experimentation, findings, further, gourd, love, loved, mandate, married, mate, qualitative, religious, republicans, scientific, study, Value, yerba, yerba mate